Thursday, February 16, 2012

Eluceat Omnibus Lux

What do Borges, Dante, Mike Tyson, Ezra Pound, Lorin Stein, and deli meats have in common? They're all masturbatory fodder for my creative process. I pretty much pull my pants down and reveal all in this story...so enjoy!

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Human Beings


This photo makes me wish I were a lion or grizzly bear, even a giraffe or rhino, a butterfly, a moth, a mole, a salmon, something, anything other than a human being.

So I guess Maria Menounos made a bet regarding Super Bowl XLVI. If her hometown team of the Patriots lost, she'd wear a Giants bikini in the middle of Times Square. If the Patriots won, her colleague A.J. Calloway would wear a Patriots cheerleader outfit. The fact that this is newsworthy, that it would somehow garner media space worth millions of dollars, makes me wish I were a crab scuttling across the floors of silent seas. There would be so much more dignity in that. If right-clicking such an image of Menounos and Mario Lopez has become an everyday part of the human condition, then we have clearly wasted our once-in-a-universe opportunity of genetically evolving from apes. I'd rather wank off from a tree and eat bugs.

P.S. Due to cropping you can't see in my pic that Menounos is also wearing Uggs to go with her bikini.